Dating Isn’t Everything (A letter to the younger girls in my life)

While I am not an expert on the subject matter of dating, I do consider myself an expert on wanting and wishing to date someone, anyone.  At age 13, I was asking for “Prince Charming” for my birthday, and by 16, I figured that I would finally be asked out.  I mean, I was old enough, wasn’t I?  I knew quite a few guys too, so why not?  By age 17, I still had not been asked out, and for once in my life, I didn’t care.  I was done with liking guys.  Or so I thought.  At age 18, still no date.  It was finally four months after turning 18, that I had my first and only date, to date.  At 18, I was experiencing my first relationship, and although it seemed good, when it was over, it left me with a lot of baggage.  A lot of pain.  And to be honest, it was not worth it.

I beg my “sisters” and my “kids”, and any other young girl who is reading this, don’t get caught up in the idea of relationships.  Your teenage years are supposed to be the years that you use to form you into the adult you will be.  Focus on being kind, and serving others.  Fix your focus on God, and on being a Godly woman.  No matter what society says, you do not need to date in this time period.  Trust me, I get it, it feels good to have a guy’s attention.  And it may feel like you are being left behind if you don’t date.  It may seem like all your friends are dating, and that it is the cool thing to do, but let me ask you, “is it ‘cool’ when your friends’ hearts break a week, or a month after getting together with the guy?  Is the pain really worth it?  Do you want to walk around with baggage because of things you did or people you dated?”  The answer to all of these is no.  Do not get sucked into the trap, it just is not worth it.  You are better than that.  You are worth more, so much more than what society would have you to believe, and you do not need to look to a guy, or guys, to find out your worth.  Open your Bible, and bask in the love and affection of God our Savior.

Now, you may be saying “Oh I won’t date for a long time.  This doesn’t apply to me.”  The truth is, one day, Lord willing, you will date.  There will be highs and there will be lows.  I have witnessed both in my friends’ life, and in my own.  Even when you are in a serious relationship, remember where your worth comes from.  Remember where your happiness and joy comes from.  Relationships may come to an end.  They may fade, but God’s love never fades.  And it never can be swept away.


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